Tom and I started speaking more and more. He was becoming insistent on meeting but he wanted me to meet him in St. George. He said that would be closer than coming all the way to Roy. He said we could get a room in St. George together. I told him that I didn't think I could afford a seperate room. He said that that didn't matter that we could just share a room. I told him no that I couldn't do that because that wouldn't be proper. I explained that my ex-husband and I had been married and sealed in the Temple and that that meant something to me. He said that just because we shared a bed didn't mean it would lead to sex. I told him I jsut didn't think I could do that. I also told him that I just didn't feel comfortable doing that because my husband and I weren't divorce yet and that if I did something like that I would be no better than him because that was why we were divorcing - he had met someone else (without kids) and decided that being with her would be less complicated than being with someone who had older kids who really didn't like him at all (they really didn't). It was really hard dealing with the fact that he had cheated on me and I explained that to Tom.
Well, fortunately (or unfortunately) I didn't have to make that choice at that time to meet him because my cousin very unexpectedly passed away and I needed to stay here for the funeral.
I just couldn't understand why he would push me to meet him in a motel and share a room when he came from an upstanding LDS family and had served a mission.
I was about to find out though
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Monday, January 18, 2010
The Beginning
I have wanted to write about my relationship with Tom for so long. I figured that it would be theraputic. I alway saw my life with him as one of those movies of the week on Lifetime Network.
I have been telling people for a while now that I was going to write a book and I have a lot written down but I thought I would write it in blog form. Maybe someone will find it and it will help them. I wish somehow I could warn everyone about him so someone else will never have to go through what I went through or my family or my friends.
So here we go...
August 2000
I was in the middle of my divorce from Sean when this happened. I was never expecting to go through another divorce. I won't go into much detail here about that marriage or divorce except to say that that marriage never should have happened. I think we both knew that. He was from England and we met through LDS Singles. He came here - I went there. Although I loved England I knew that relationship should have stayed there - in England. But I felt so much guilt over him giving up everything to come here that I went through with it. It was the worse two years of both of our lives.
So how did I come to meet Tom?
Again, I turned to LDS Singles to try and meet someone. I didn't want to be alone. I thought my kids would be better off if there was a "father" type figure in the house. Little did I know that my example probably would have been enough and that we were happy the way we were.
I was getting ready to go to my class reunion and had been in the chat room when this guy kept pestering me. It was fun talking and flirting but I needed to go so I told him maybe we would talk again sometime.
When I got home I logged back in to the Internet just to see if he was still in the chat room. He was and we started where we left off. He asked if he could call and I said I thought that would be ok. I didn't give him my house number but told him he could call on my cell phone. I didn't want him to be able to trace me. Afterall, I was a single parent with two children I had to protect.
Well, we talked for about two hours. It was fun but I got the impression even then that there was something he wasn't telling me.
And that would be the start of the lies and deceit.
I have been telling people for a while now that I was going to write a book and I have a lot written down but I thought I would write it in blog form. Maybe someone will find it and it will help them. I wish somehow I could warn everyone about him so someone else will never have to go through what I went through or my family or my friends.
So here we go...
August 2000
I was in the middle of my divorce from Sean when this happened. I was never expecting to go through another divorce. I won't go into much detail here about that marriage or divorce except to say that that marriage never should have happened. I think we both knew that. He was from England and we met through LDS Singles. He came here - I went there. Although I loved England I knew that relationship should have stayed there - in England. But I felt so much guilt over him giving up everything to come here that I went through with it. It was the worse two years of both of our lives.
So how did I come to meet Tom?
Again, I turned to LDS Singles to try and meet someone. I didn't want to be alone. I thought my kids would be better off if there was a "father" type figure in the house. Little did I know that my example probably would have been enough and that we were happy the way we were.
I was getting ready to go to my class reunion and had been in the chat room when this guy kept pestering me. It was fun talking and flirting but I needed to go so I told him maybe we would talk again sometime.
When I got home I logged back in to the Internet just to see if he was still in the chat room. He was and we started where we left off. He asked if he could call and I said I thought that would be ok. I didn't give him my house number but told him he could call on my cell phone. I didn't want him to be able to trace me. Afterall, I was a single parent with two children I had to protect.
Well, we talked for about two hours. It was fun but I got the impression even then that there was something he wasn't telling me.
And that would be the start of the lies and deceit.
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